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Reflections

Why A Hug For The Holidays Might Be the Best Gift of All


Emotional nourishment is something you must tap into. This includes love, respect and protection.

In fact, if you are feeling:

  • Unloved
  • Disrespected
  • Vulnerable

You might be self-isolating or living in fear-based life. 

This holiday, I'd like you to try the following three strategies to get more love-nourishment, more touch (and health) in your life.

Why A Hug For The Holidays Might Be the Best Gift of All

by Michele Paiva

December 13, 2017


We know that the holiday season, be it Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza or other celebrations, are filled with festivities and celebrations.

We also know that you might be feeling frazzled, stressed or isolated.

You need love. You need to be touched. 

Before I go on, let's talk about "why" this connects to your skin.

You actually might not even be aware that deep down you are feeling stressed, as we've become so detached from our inner-worlds, that we often do not realize how we "feel" until we have a "symptom" like depression, anxiety, acne or hives.

Skin struggles are a blessing; they are true body language.

While your skin is your largest organ, designed for survival, it is also constantly "talking" to you. Giving you messages that you will listen to, sooner or later, in the form of the itch, the inflammation or the flare up. Try to see these messages as not an inconvenience but a beautiful connection to your deeper self.

My mother was raised in an orphanage, and often spoke of her lack of being hugged. She was plagued with rashes and hives and shingles, throughout her later years, when she began to allow her sorrow to surface on those early years. I didn't know it at the time, but that was a healing crisis for her.

Many years ago, a French psychoanalyst, Rene' Spitz, studied children in orphanages. Those who were hugged and touched, had a better immune system and disposition. Those who were seldom picked up or hugged, did not grow properly - some even died.

Our needs are not just food and water, but also, love and touch. During the holiday, you might have a hard time getting close to stressed or alienated family. You might be single and feeling like there is no one to "hug" you. You might be feeling isolated on this season which is encased in the idea of couples, happy family gatherings and more.

Emotional nourishment is something you must tap into. This includes love, respect and protection.

In fact, if you are feeling:

  • Unloved
  • Disrespected
  • Vulnerable

You might be self-isolating or living in fear-based life. 

This holiday, I'd like you to try the following three strategies to get more love-nourishment, more touch (and health) in your life.

1. Treat yourself to a pedicure at least once this season. Find a salon or spa that includes some type of a massage element with the pedicure. You'll be giving yourself a treat while also experiencing a boost of nourishing oxytocin and a passive holiday "hug".

2. Sit on Santa's lap! Go ahead; grab a friend (or two) and go sit on Santa's lap. Talk to him, thank him and enjoy the hug! 

3. Take photos with family and friends. Just the act of taking photos brings people shoulder to shoulder, and sometimes in an embrace. 

Bonus: Get a massage. It's a wonderful way to get about an hour of touch, and it is so very healing emotionally.

Do not forget that other's need touch, too. While you don't want to cross boundaries, you might invite someone you suspect might be isolated or lacking touch (a lackluster marriage, maybe someone single or a shut-in) for a pedicure or to visit Santa with you.

 

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